Wellcultured - A men's fashion, fitness, sex, and lifestyle magazine.

Sometimes, I just enjoy going to the mall to shop. Well, that’s actually not true. I go to see what people are selling- and I generally just observe. Much like a crazy sociologist, I have more fun looking and observing for hours than actually participating- and I learn quite a bit. In that vein, here’s a list of the newest fashion trends that are still being sold that you should avoid like the plague this Spring.

Light colored Acid Wash Jeans

These were in popularity for a while via your traditional “Beach style” retailers (meaning places like Hollister) and sold fairly well, but sales and popularity last year do not dictate this year’s fashion. For those of us who don’t live directly on the beach, dressing as such makes you look lost and completely out of place. In general such high school-esque fads should be far removed from your sphere, but this is one special no-no: it looks stupid no matter what.

Part of the irony of this entire “look” is that it only looks good with the styles from the same brand, meaning to pull this off appropriately you not only have to purchase the jeans, but you have to purchase many other things as well, such as the shirts and belts. This tends to get expensive, for obvious reasons.

Skinny Jeans

Dressing into a fad does not make you stylish. Read that once more. Dressing into a fad does not make you stylish. Just because you’ve figured out how to dress like a “Scene” kid, you don’t automatically win an award for being stylish or classy. Skinny Jeans are for WOMEN, not for men, and any infringement of this rule makes you look like you want to go take your MacBook to Starbucks and listen to the latest Radiohead album.

There is an exception to this rule depending on the cut of the jeans, of course- some stuff will look fine. However, so far as the general sense of the term is concerned, Skinny Jeans = no.

Excessive Stripes/Argyle

While stripes and Argyle have their place in the world, some retailers have gone absolutely overboard to the point of selling nothing but. The rule here is to take advantage of this by getting classy styles with stripes and Argyle, but try to avoid wearing nothing but: you will look boring. Still, I’m rather pleased with the more classy look that retailers such as the Gap are promoting nowadays, as it’s leagues better to go overboard with Argyle than to go overboard with the “Miami Beach” look.

Hollister and related looks

Okay, that’s it, game over, etc.- Hollister and Abercrombie & Fitch clothing are old and outdated. The “Miami Beach” look (or whatever you really want to call it, you know it when you see it) is old and dead, and adhering to it (like I mentioned above) makes you look out of place and retarded. By all means, this doesn’t mean you should trash the clothing you purchased there- it’s still acceptable enough to pass- but it’s far from something you want to invest any more money in until you see if they come up with a new line or not.

Note that this, in my opinion, applies more to girls than to guys. I’m personally quite tired of seeing this style on girls, and I’d like a nice refreshing change.
Cardigans

This is the number one absolute no. I have no idea how these became popular (feel free to post if you do), but it has translated into one of the worst styles I’ve seen in a long time. Cardigans make me feel like someone watched a bit too much Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood- and even Mr. Rogers only wore them because his mother/grandmother knitted them for him. Cardigans do not accentuate any kind of notable body part, and they basically make you look exactly what you would normally think they would make you look: Boring and unoriginal.

Tags: Abercrombie & Fitch, acid wash jeans, argyle, Cardigans, Fashion, hollister, skinny jeans, The Gap