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Did you know that your body produces the chemical phenylethylamine when you look someone directly in the eye, which can be responsible for some love triggers in the brain? 

Eye contact is this thing that some of us are naturally good at or unnaturally terrified of. There is no middle ground, like cilantro, you love it or you hate it. Okay, well maybe it’s not that extreme, but it is most certainly that important, not only in your dating life, but in your all around everyday life.

Look Interested

They say that people who keep eye contact are typically perceived as more reliable, honest and confident people. Now these are three traits we can all use a little more of. When you make and maintain eye contact you are showing the person with whom you are engaged with that you are interested in what they are saying, even if you aren’t. Side note, the lack of interest is certainly one of those things you should just keep to yourself. No one is telling you to lie here; we’re just offering tips for better contact.

Confidence Killer

Go over some situations in your head where you found the person you were trying to speak with was looking everywhere but your eyes, not so cool. When you’re talking to a friend, a colleague, a date, a dog, whomever, as soon as you observe they are relentlessly looking at the door, the floor, their phone, you will undoubtedly notice your confidence level sliding to the zero side of the ruler.

Meet The Eye

By maintaining a level of eye contact you are showing an appreciation towards others. We all want to feel valued and respected. Of course it may feel uncomfortable or intimidating to maintain eye contact if its something you’re not use to. However, as it turns out, by avoiding eye contact you are revealing your weaknesses rather than masking them.  Whether consciously or subconsciously the person you are engaged with will notice a lack of confidence. If you suffer an extreme case of avoidance, most likely the person you are talking to will notice, “He was nice, but every time he spoke he seemed to be looking everywhere but me.” You don’t want to be said ‘he.’

Be Present!

Be present, be in the moment, and share the moment, by simply sharing eye contact. It not only creates a shared space between you and that person, but it allows you to get a better read of the other person. If you notice that they are avoiding eye contact, perhaps they are not as secure as you imagined, or perhaps they are not at all interested in what you’re saying. Let’s assume the first explanation as truth for ego’s sake.

Create an awareness of what’s going on around you, outside of you, and perhaps into the person you actually are interested in. You may even notice an incline in confidence and overall respect from yourself and others, not a bad outcome if you ask me.

Tags: attraction, Dating, eye contact