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Romantic gift.

Every year, Valentine’s Day leaves men either stumped on what to get or taking the easy way out with chocolate, roses, and a stuffed animal. Unless your girlfriend specifically asks for those gifts, think outside the heart box and get her something personal that not only says, “I love you,” but also, “I know you.”

The Secret

The key to doing this is knowing what makes your girlfriend feel loved. Dr. Gary Chapman explains in his book The Five Love Languages that there are five ways in which people express and feel love: quality time, words of affirmation, gifts, acts of service, and physical touch. Once you figure out which love language is hers, it’s much easier to pick out a Valentine’s Day gift.

Quality Time

Quality time includes doing something or talking. The perfect gift would be tickets to a venue or event to which you can go together and discuss afterward, such as a:

• Concert
• Play, opera, ballet, or symphony
• Sports game
• Comedy or magic show
• Museum or special exhibit
• Zoo or aquarium
• Movie theater

Words of Affirmation

Words are powerful. If your girlfriend loves hearing you compliment her and tell her why you love her, then write her a love letter or poem. If you have musical talent, write her a song and perform it for her. Extra points if you capture it on video, too, so she can show it off to all her friends.

Gifts

Some women prefer tangible items, but this doesn’t mean you should automatically go with candy and flowers. This is the time to show her how well you’ve been listening to and learning about her. Is there a piece of clothing or fashion accessory she’s been wanting? Is there a special place that’s meaningful to her or your relationship from which you could buy a souvenir? If you haven’t dated each other much yet and you’re unsure of her taste, check out her Pinterest board or Instagram account.

Ideas for Acts of Service

Maybe to your girlfriend, nothing says “I love you” more than helping without asking. You can clean her place, make her dinner, fix her car, or play with her kids so she can get something done. If you’re unsure what you should do or how to do it, ask her.

Ideas for Physical Touch

Your first thought may be sex, but actually, this refers more to affection than sexual advances. Give her a massage or make an appointment for her at a spa or salon. The whole day, shower her with sweet, nonsexual physical contact. Brush her cheek, hold her hand, and give her hugs. She will feel the tenderness in your touch.

Women desire to be understood. Pay attention to her this week to discover what the perfect Valentine’s Day gift is for her. The type of gift you buy will express to her how well you get her, which in turn will reveal how much you truly love her.

Tags: Five Love Languages, Gary Chapman, romantic gift, valentine's day, valentine's day gift